The kid aint right.

Leo: and on a side note i hate lauryn hill

me: she hates you too

Leo: well good shes a rasicist bitch

u every get those pie charts done…i told my boss i would have them today!

me: what?


i have to do my own shit

Leo: wtf!!!!!!!!!!!


me: you can resize them douche

Leo: wtf man

me: you are making more work for yourself

shut up

Leo: im gunna get fired

me: stop being a bitch

Leo: haha

ur to easy

me: you know you can resize them right

ur too gay

to live

Leo: to like live or die or like a live show?

me: both

Leo: one day u should just bring some fire crackers with u to work and throw one out of ur cube from time to time..u know to keep people on there toes

me: or be like you and have a fog horn

people would be like…. where is that coming from?

Leo: that was pretty funny

me: that shit hurts

Leo: ima fucking genius whos scared of the ladies

lets go on the cougar cruise and get some hot older bitches

me: im down

seriously like you said, we got nothign to lose

what are they gona do laught at us, call us gay…. say no..

who cares, i’m over it

Leo: yeah

Leo: but its like going on stage live all of sudden its right in front of me and im running around (mind u nothings happend yet) like o my god what am i gunna do…i know get it to go so i have absolutely no shot, genius!

me: you get ahead of yourself


Leo: maybe i should just pull out my penis



to much

me: helicopter usually works

Leo: lol

i do get ahead of my self..its like i talk to a bitch for a minute and i already wanna fuck

no wonder girls always tell me i look lio just wants to fuckke the guy wh

u ever get that feeling that u’ve blacked out sometime and fucked girls

and the next time u see them u dont remeber them and they r like fuck u

i think thaats me

stickin my dick in girls ears

Leo: yea now ur gunna have to settle for hicks and adopt a baby from haiti

me: i do.

Leo: hey jon


me: yes?

Leo: hey jon


me: hey

Leo: guess what

Leo: hey penis wrinkle

yea im taalkin to u u buttfaced queef smellin mutha fucker

what u gonna do bitch

yea thats what i thought goat dick sucking taint

hey penis ears im gunna kick ur ass!

and then buy u a dog and let u get close to it and then kill it

awww is the wittle baby scared of the man whos gunna buy him a hamster let him get close to it then rape it

u prolly wanna decorate ur room with tinler bell shit u harry potter lovin fag

its no fun u knnow when u dont react or say anything

but i know ur kinda getting pissed so its still kinda funny


i WILL start texting u!

me: you are so gay!

i’m going to kill both of your dogs, just to send a message!

Leo: send a message to who..u’d b doin me a favor

me: thats fucked up

charlie bear



Leo: sabre

and no u wouldnt kill them u dont have it in u

i was a pretty nice rant i went on though im good

why dont u find a job up here?

i need a roomate

me: dude

move down here

so much better

Leo: find me a job

and im there

me: i would like to my friend

working on my pops still

when i have time

me: you should come down here this weekend

Leo: u should come up here

party at my casa now that momma bear has moved out


me: im comin up there next weekend

Leo: fo what?

me: fa fun

Leo: do it ths weekend insteads

me: nah


no drivey

my car is fuckey

i need to get it fixed this weekend

Leo: get it fixed this week

this week

come up weekend

me: next weekend


i say irack sir

Leo: wht possesion means the most to u/

me: my car/drumset/surfboards

Leo: aight besides those franken dick

me: my penis

Leo: and u suck at surfing im the shit ill teach u one day

me: false

one day you might learn

and understand

Leo: ur penis is an epic fail…try again

me: my penis is a monument



Leo: to all the tiny penises out there

me: my dick is far from tiny, but i’ll let you think what you want

since you like to think about my dick

Leo: fail

just like in life

me: i do fail



Leo: ur like fucking eyore sometimes

me: you’re like fucking kermit the frog sometimes

Leo: that’s cool

me: not really

hes annoying and kinda gay

Leo: u get real mad sometimes

me: hahahah

Leo: its cool though

me: you just think i get mad

and i think that is funny

Leo: mad or annoyed one of the two

me: most the time you really can’t phase me anymore

i know you well by know

Leo: annoyed about how awesome i am

me: you do like to push buttons,, but i brush it off

Leo: oh know if i want to i can push some real buttons

but i like u so i don’t

i don’t like buttons after reading it

such a dirty word

dude u gonna get me a Christmas present for all that u have done to my people

me: are you jewden?

Leo: hahaha….poop hole…lol

me: juden?

Leo: yeah our family is half dummy

me: i kILL YOU ALLLLLLL!!!!!!!!

Leo: thats why i can make the jew jokes

me: jewboy

das juden

Leo: whos the hottest girl we both know?

me: ummm…..

not sure

Leo: unacceptable answer

think focker


me: ummmm……..

theres tons of hot chicks

me: im sorry im no fun today

i got slammed with a to-do list today

slamm donged

and i’m going to a hardcore show by myself tonight

thats how gay i am

Leo: liar

me: yeah

you are pushing it mister

next time i see you, i’m gonna get you blacked out drunk and somehow get you to slam your dick and balls in a car door

then lock the doors and start driving

Leo: what could i post on ur wall that would piss u off

me: you could piss me off in a lot of ways

i tell you everything

you could pretty much divulge all my personal info, and i would hate you

and probably hurt you somehow

Leo: yeah i would never

fuckin computer

i would never betray our trust

me: good

second that

Leo: can i tell people u wanna have sex with nazi babies?

me: that would be false

i kill them

Leo: and then fuckem!….ewwwww dude ur sick!!!


Leo: what is a

‘face palm


me: grab someone or something by the face


Leo: not a good explination

me: its simple

Leo: ur simple bitch

me: im very complex actually

and sensitive

Leo: yeah like a bitch, bitch!


me: Bitches

Leo: dude u cross the line way to often bro

me: you suck nathans weiners

Leo: i do like hot dogs nice try

u like to lick dog penis and then stick fire ants in butt while a horse poops on u and give a hand job to a sheep!

uze ones nastys fuckin bitch duder!

me: that is crazy shit you just said there

Leo: yea im good at that

me: yes you are

me: whatever

pirate code bitch

Leo: u cant break the bro code

me: pirate code mf

Leo: what was that skit on saturday nite live

a nite at the ashbury

me: roxbury

me: bro dix

pirate code bitch!

Leo: hahaha…im gunna do the close talker

me: she wont like that

Leo: get like right in her face everytimre i talk….like im gunna kiss her but not…lmao

u wanna make a bet i cant kiss h?e


i can kiss her?

me: sure

Leo: how much son?

me: this is all based on the grounds that i even bring you around her

your close talked thing made me laught though

Leo: ohfuck thAT

dont b a punk

all in good fun

dont b a bitch son

me: dont be a weirdo and you might get to hang out with some hot chicks

Leo: i swear i talk like dr seuss sometimes!

thats my apeal son

u wish u had this swag b!

me: false

i am metrosexual/gay

i have my own swahger

Leo: so u r g!a

me: glamorous bithc

well manicured butt

Leo: u prolly put on make up when u get home from work and bedazzle stuff

me: i bedazzle my ballfro

braids and such

Leo: sound bout right

me: realllllllly long ball fro

animals live in there

a few birds and squirrels

Leo: yup

maybe a homeless guy or two

me: i can’t work anymore

i hate being alive



Leo: efil?

me: balls=you sucking em

im still laughing inside about the idea of you getting your dick somehow caught in the car door and me driving awway!!!!


im crying right now!

Leo: wtf….lmao


Leo: im laughing at meeting this girl and gettting right in her face until she backs into a wall or falls down!…lol

me: haha, yeah she will be liike…. who is that guy?

what is his deal

i’ll just tell her youre retarded and i watch you on the weekends

Leo: lol


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